When you're ungrateful for the parenting season you're in (2024)

Sleeping 90 minutes at a time. Worrying if the cough was something more. Cleaning breast pump parts. The season when our two girls were little was a season I’d rather forget that cherish. I could not get away from the crying, diaper changing, and sleep deprivation fast enough.

You might be in this season now. Or maybe you’ve made it through the baby/toddler season, but your new season doesn’t seem to be any easier. You wonder, “Surely, the next season will be better than this one! Let’s get to that one now!”

When you're ungrateful for the parenting season you're in (1)

There are seasons of parenting that we just aren’t grateful for.

The newborn season ushers in worries about health, weight gain, and sleeping patterns.

The toddler stage has us wondering if we’ll ever sit down and enjoy a hot cup of coffee again.

Those elementary years find us relinquishing our children to outside influences that we don’t have control over as our kids learn how to navigate homework and becoming more independent.

And middle school? Who hasn’t want to rush through middle school??!?!

Finally, those high school years of phones, hormones, and friends when we as parents hope we’ve done a good job and we coach our kids from the sidelines.

Each stage has its pros and cons, and each stage has those parts that we don’t want to cherish, but would rather skip past.

But what does God have to say about these seasons?

In every season, God is doing good work in us and through us.

Every season is both wonderful and hard, and every season has its God-ordained purpose. Here are three reasons to be thankful for the season you’re in.

God has called you for such a time as this.

Yes, this. This sleep deprivation. This never-ending laundry pile of onesies or uniforms. This time to chauffeur an entire soccer team.

God assigned you these people with these flaws and struggles for such a time as this. He’s placed you where He’s placed you so that you can be conformed more and more into the image of His Son.

God isn’t ignorant of your situation and He will never leave you on your own. He isn’t shocked that you’re tired or frustrated or wondering what to do next. He’s placed you in this season so that you’ll become the mama He’s designed you to be.

God gave you your position as a mom for such a time as this.

God uses every season of motherhood to refine you.

Yes, you. You are His favorite. You are the one He’s just crazy about. You are the one He picked to raise these children. You are who He thinks about and sings over.

God uses the method of motherhood to bring you into alignment with Him. He isn’t surprised that there are certain parts of it that you aren’t thankful for, but He’s specifically placed in you this season at this time so that He can peel away the sin and selfishness so that you become whole and wholly His.

Motherhood brings with it expectations we think you’re supposed to meet, isolation we feel closing in, and anger over the littlest things. But the beautiful part is that God uses all of those messy situations to bring us into His arms. He hears our confession, speaks truth to our hearts, and loves us into forgiveness.

God refines us more into the image of His Son as we parent with Him.

God knows motherhood is hard.

Yes, hard. Hard because motherhood is physically demanding. Hard because it seems like the only way to get it all done is to clone ourselves. Hard because our kids break our hearts with their defiance and hurtful words and disobedience.

God designed it so everything we do can sanctify us, set us apart, and this includes motherhood. Motherhood is hard and sanctifying, which means that we desperately need God and we desperately need others.

If motherhood was easy, we would be self-sufficientand there’d be no need to trust and obey God because we’d have it all together. If motherhood was easy, we wouldn’t need people like mentor moms or same-stage-of-life friends who’d share our burdens. But motherhood is hard on purpose so that we could learn that we aren’t self-sufficient, but God-dependent and community-contingent.

When you're ungrateful for the parenting season you're in (2)

God is with us in each and every season, even the ones we’re not grateful for.

Mama, it’s okay if you’re not thrilled with the stage you’re in. It’s hard to get excited about spit-up or helping with homework or watching Paw Patrol when you’d really rather watch Gilmore Girls. It’s okay to take note of the hard just like you remember the good.

But let’s not wish this season away.

God has placed you in this season for such a time as this to refine you and to partner with Him and others. There is something that God will teach you and show you and love you through if you’re willing to not wish the season away.

God is just crazy about you even when you’re not crazy about the season you’re in. And sometimes that’s all we need to know to carry us through.

Written by me and originally published at For Every Mom.

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When you're ungrateful for the parenting season you're in (2024)

FAQs

What causes a child to be ungrateful? ›

Kids Feel like They Have No Control

Sometimes, a child demonstrating ungrateful behavior is doing so not because they don't like the things they have, but because they don't like knowing that they have to get everything they need through somebody else. In a way, that is a very grown-up feeling for them to have.

What to say to an ungrateful daughter? ›

Be specific without being insulting. For instance, avoid saying something like, “Stop being a brat.” Instead, say something like, “Complaining about not getting more presents is ungrateful. Your friends and family were kind enough to buy you a gift when they didn't have to buy you anything.”

What is an example of being ungrateful? ›

It is a symptom of ingratitude if someone continuously dismisses your efforts or takes them for granted. If you have a friend who never appreciates your assistance or thanks you for going out of your way to aid them, they may be ungrateful.

How to teach an ungrateful child to be grateful? ›

Put things in perspective

Talk to your kids about those who are less fortunate. Don't scare them, but don't keep them in the dark either. Understanding that not everyone has the same advantages will help them develop compassion for others and gratitude for their own privileges.

How do you deal with unappreciative adult children? ›

How to deal with a disrespectful grown child
  1. Practice clear, open communication. A child's motivation for their behavior is as unique as the individual. ...
  2. Evaluate one's own behavior. ...
  3. Apologize. ...
  4. Set clear boundaries.
Oct 4, 2023

What does an ungrateful child look like? ›

An ungrateful child might:

Expect bribes or rewards for good behavior. Pass blame when things go wrong. Show inability to handle disappointment. Rarely take initiative to help.

What is a famous quote on ungrateful? ›

It is another's fault if he be ungrateful, but it is mine if I do not give. To find one thankful man, I will oblige a great many that are not so. The children of the revolution are always ungrateful, and the revolution must be grateful that it is so.

How do you respond to a disrespectful daughter? ›

Drawing the Line: Tips to Handle Angry Disrespectful Child Behaviour
  1. Don't Take Your Child's Behaviour Personally. ...
  2. Model Respectful Behaviour for Your Child. ...
  3. Don't Give Your Child “Permission” to be Disrespectful. ...
  4. Remind Your Child of the Good They Do. ...
  5. Don't Try to Force Your Child to Respect You. ...
  6. Practice Active Listening.
Jan 19, 2019

What does an entitled child act like? ›

In other words, an entitled person feels that they deserve something even though they haven't earned it—recognition, rewards, good grades, or a promotion. They see only their needs as important, and often feel the rules don't apply to them.

What does being ungrateful lead to? ›

When you're ungrateful, you're not concentrating on the good aspects of your life, leaving you resentful and even angry. You're scanning for what's missing, making choices based on what is lacking rather than what you have to work with, which can really go against your path to true happiness.

What causes a person to be ungrateful? ›

With that said, some factors that may contribute to ungratefulness include: Early childhood conditioning. We may not have been taught how to be grateful. Or, traumatic experiences may have inhibited our capacity for gratitude.

How to treat an ungrateful person? ›

Outline why you think they've been ungrateful, and give them a chance to answer. Try to use “I” statements instead of casting blame. For example, you could say “I feel like you take for granted how often I help you with work projects, even though we don't work for the same company.” Your tone should be firm, but open.

How to react when a child is ungrateful? ›

1) Avoid punishing ingratitude. For example, do not take away a toy if they complain about not having enough toys or take away dessert when your child does not say “thank you".” 2) Avoid blaming yourself for your child's ingratitude. Self-blame likely will not increase your child's gratitude.

What is the quote about an ungrateful child? ›

In King Lear Shakespeare says “How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless child.” So here are a few thoughts on gratitude to help us avoid the serpent's tooth.

How to help your child be more grateful? ›

Teaching children gratitude can help them feel happier, support better social relationships, and improve overall health and well-being. Strategies that can help foster gratitude in kids include asking gratitude-focused questions, performing acts of kindness, and modeling gratitude in your own life.

What are ungrateful characteristics? ›

People who are ungrateful tend to be characterized by an excessive sense of self-importance, arrogance, vanity, and an unquenchable need for admiration and approval. Narcissists reject the ties that bind people into relationships of reciprocity. They expect special favors and feel no need to pay back or pay forward.

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